Cut to A Brief Thought

These past few days I've had so much on my mind...I don't know if there's ever been this much on my mind. It would take hours to write about it all and I don't feel like depressing myself all over again. So I'll just briefly rant about this:
Over the past few weeks I've been getting to know this one guy and he's awesome, I love absolutely everything about him, he's hilarious, he's nice, he's just amazing. It's hard to describe how epic he is. He's that type of guy thought that everyone loves, that's friends with everyone. I'd say that we're friends. I've probably talked to him more than any other guy before. I know what you're thinking, you think that I'm falling for him. See, that's just the thing, I feel like I should because he's so awesome, but I only see him as a friend. He doesn't like me, so the question is, why do I worry so much about this? I don't know how I feel about him, but I really want him to pay attention to me, to like me. He likes talking to other people a lot more than me. I'm not all that interesting, I understand, but I just want him to like me...I don't have all that many friends. I'm a clingy person...I need people to stick by me all the time. That's why friends are so hard for me to find. I'm somewhat demanding. I'm not okay with people jumping between cliques, like he does...I want him to stay with me and my friends. I'm selfish...but he's just so awesome and fun to talk to.
It makes me sad, everyone loves this kid, yet he complains about having no friends, about no one asking him to events. There's another guy that I've mentioned before that I have feelings for, who's also like this. Both of these guys are really ticking me off. Both have tons of friends, they just refuse to realize it. The other guy, people are always asking him how he is, telling him to call them, but he never does. I haven't talked to him in over a week...if he doesn't want to talk to me, he should just say so. It would save us both so much trouble...But back to the kid. I invited him to go to a thing with me, but because we're friends he didn't think I was serious. It didn't bother me that much, but grr, he's still complaining about people never inviting him to anything! I just did!
Oh, man, I need to stop letting other people bother me so much!

New Look

You may notice that Uncertain Knight has a new look. I liked the previous look, but I guess I'm trying to display that our battle is out there in the everyday world, hence this new background.
I often wrestle over what exactly I should use this blog for. So far it's been more for general situations and emotions more than actual events going on in my life. I sort of like having it so I can just concentrate on the emotions of situations, but at the same time it would be nice to go more into situations...so I'm not sure exactly what I'll do with this...
Anyways, I'm in a pretty good mood for once, amazing, yes. I went out driving today, went to the comic shop, and that's about it, but it was a pretty decent day. I love getting out of the house.
So it really bothers me, there's this person I care a lot about, I tried "talking" to them the other day and they said they'd be right back, and of course they never came back. This bothers me a lot, it happens to me all the time, but I didn't let it bother me too much that time. But then apparently this person is all depressed and stuff, thinks they have no friends. It makes me want to scream! I was there, trying to talk to them! They could talk to me any time and they know it! They do it to themselves! Ahhh! People don't realize what they have until it's gone. One day I'll leave and he'll miss me, maybe as much as I miss him...

Shut the...

It really bothers me when people don't know how to shut up. Yes, I can blab quite a bit myself, but that's to my friends. I know some people who will just go on and on to people they don't even know. And then they cut people off. They don't let them get a word in. You don't have to comment on every little thing...
I don't even know why I just wrote all of that above. That issue bothers me every instant of every day.
It just bothers me that I can't enjoy myself because someone will be talking so much I can't think straight. I want my happiness to depend on myself, not the people and circumstances around me.
Also, not everything is a conspiracy. Some people think everything is. It's just plain annoying. Not everyone is out to get you. Not everyone is intelligent. Not everyone cares.